"Beautiful day in New York City," David Letterman mused on the "Late Show" recently. "Am I right about that? A gorgeous day. It was so nice today that AIG gave a bonus to Al Roker."
That joke, part of Letterman's March 17 monologue, wasn't penned by the late-night host or one of the dozen writers on his staff. It was written by Phil Johnson, a freelance writer and Web developer, sitting at home in Boston.
Johnson says he has gotten more than 160 of his jokes on the "Late Show With David Letterman" and, before that, "The Tonight Show With Jay Leno."
The 39-year-old is part of an underground network of comedy writers who supply the late-night programs with a constant stream of material. If one of their jokes gets on the air, they get a check for $75 or $100. What they don't get is any credit or union pay.
That doesn't daunt Matt Little, an unemployed comedian who spends hours each day scouring news websites in his Brooklyn apartment, crafting one-liners that may never air. The 28-year-old got his joke-writing start while working as a page at the "Late Show," where he persuaded the head monologue writer to let him submit material.
Little still remembers what it felt like the first time Letterman used one of his jokes. The quip: "It was so hot out today that Rupert Murdoch bought Dairy Queen."
"I was in the balcony paging that day, and I had to run off in the corner where it was really dark and kind of jumped around, trying not to scream like a little girl," he recalled.
For each of the 15 or 20 jokes that he's gotten on the air, he's received a check for $75 from Worldwide Pants, Letterman's production company. In the memo line, it reads "one joke."
"You pour so much time into this," said Little, who also submits material for the "Weekend Update" segment of "Saturday Night Live." "And you don't find out until the show airs if you got a joke on or not. I like to say that it's like you're holding your lottery ticket in your hand, hoping that the words match up."
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